The Beauty that is Change

To exist is to change, to change is to mature, to mature is to go on creating oneself endlessly.-Henri Bergson

The first time I saw Olyessa she was standing nervously in the Nicholiev branch building foyer. With eyes glued to the floor I could make out dark circles beneath her eyes. Her clothing was simple and by worldly standards there was nothing particularly beautiful about her. The Elders introduced us and we attempted conversation. It must have been intimidating for her to be standing, conversing with a bunch of American missionaries. Her answers were short and timid. I wasn't sure what to think of her. She seemed innocent to be sure, childlike almost, but something about her countenance was dim, sad.

We began to teach her the basic principals of the gospel. I'm not sure how much she understood. Though she was in her mid twenties, teaching her felt more like teaching a 10-year-old. Maybe even an 8-year-old. The branch president expressed some concern that working with her might be a waste of our precious time. I confess, I wondered the same thing. Was there any point in teaching her if she wasn't going to understand? Even if she did get baptized, she would never be the kind of member who would bring others into the church. We came very close to calling it quits. We rationalized that she was so innocent, she probably didn't need baptism.

I will forever be grateful that we didn't give up on her.

As we continued to meet, I learned more of her life. Her mother had died when she was young and she lived in a tiny apartment with her father. A simple life. She worked at a cookie factory and would always bring us batches of reject cookies. She was sweet and kind. Without guile. Also very trusting. One day on her way to meet with us some gypsies had hypnotized her and stolen some money. She looked sheepish and we felt bad, but had to laugh a little. That was just so Olyessa! The more I knew her, the more I loved her. And she was beginning to change.

On the day of her baptism I wished I could have seen the old Olyessa standing next to the new Olyessa. What a contrast that would have been! Her countenance was completely changed. No longer a sad, dark-eyed little girl. She smiled, light was beaming from her eyes. Dressed in white, she was completely pure and completely beautiful.

Though I still don't know if she really needed to be baptized, I do know that my companion and I needed her. We needed see that change to know that it is possible. It's sad to think that we almost gave up on her. I'm so eternally grateful that God hasn't given up on me. Olyessa became beautiful to me, not because of who she was or is now but because I had the honor to see what she had overcome. Through the power of the atonement she changed and change is beautiful! I want to learn to see those around me, not as who they are, but as who they will become.